Brrng!

Brrng!!

Brrng!!!

The noise gets louder and more intense each minute.

You don’t want to get up.

No

..infact you’ve just started welcoming the new guests that just arrived..

Ever since you put up the advert …

(“House open”!)

Learn how to fight like Vandamme

Throw punches like brucelee

Break necks like Rambo

And do stunts like Jackie.

Be the new James bond in your street.

Ex Commando. who once worked with MI6 ..vows to train you. to so beat the shit out of your bullies..they’ll be begging to work for you(no matter their size, form or build)..in as little as 30 days time”)

You’ve been receiving visitors per minute

They’ve been coming in droves.

And as the hospitable man that you are..you’ve been quite entertaining.

You usher them into your huge and luxurious banqueting hall.

A huge table has been set..with mouthwatering dishes in the numbers

Plates have been spread out. It’s an all you can eat banquet

“Serve yourself.”

You tell them..and you watch in wonder as they all rush to each grab a plate..

Mouths begin to tear into the pieces of flesh In front of them..

The veggies..(calm and collected)..settled down for a serving of water , cucumbers and a glass of milk.

Midway in between the meal..

You tap your glass cup (half filled with red wine)..with a fork

Tingg!!!

The sound echoes through the entire room.

All eyes are on you In a minute.

“What can be so important you would interrupt us in-between meals”?

They ask

As if on cue…you clear your throat and begin your speech

*Ahem…

Greetings to you youngsters of all people and kind.

I’m Alex..your host and you’re welcome to my humble home..

I’m happy to have you here today and I hope you are too.

I’m about to take you on a journey.

An exciting one at that….

And by the end of this journey…I promise you..

You’ll be so good at this skill …you’ll be able to throw any opponent of balance within seconds

It doesn’t matter his size, age or weight.

You’re going to be so good…those street junkies are gonna look up to you..and scream your name in the streets

You’ll be feared and respected by all and sundry.( Even grown men)

At the mention of your name..even animals would tremble.

In your respective fields you’ll be…

Brrrng!!!!!!

There it was again.

That annoying sound from before. It had been going on and on like an alarm clock on steroids..

“Won’t this dude just get tired and walk away?”

Brrrng!!!!!!!!

It rings again.

You waited

Tick! Tock ! Tick! Tock!

30 secs breeze by..as the wind beat against the roof .. furiously

Brrrnggg!!!!!

And then you hear it .

Mr Alex..

You don’t know me..so in. the next few minutes I’ll introduce myself

But first”

OPEN THIS DOOR!!! I’m freezing to the teeth!!!

Now you get up

And on opening the door..you see a young man

Face blue from the cold

In light clothes (a pink tee shirt..and a denim trouser)

shaking from the heavy downpour that had been going on for almost 2 hrs..

He’s dripping wet. His teeths are clattering continuously.

He just can’t stop shaking

You usher him into the fire place…

Rush into the kitchen and come out with freshly prepared hot chocolate..

You offer it to him…

With cold and really feverish hands ..he takes it

And gulps it down…slowwly.

As he finishes the last drop..

The cup falls from his hand…

His hands go limp..his eyes close slowly..as he passes out.

Hey

If by now you don’t really get the drift

I’m Ukeme an aspiring copywriter .

Normally I don’t do this (I’m scared)..

Just for fun

I decided to do this

So tell me…

How well did this crappy, totally unbelievable piece of trash..interest you?